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[21 Mar 2011|02:13pm]

Out of curiosity, does anyone still read this community?
3 entertained.

Posting old AIM conversations with Sean Freeman [31 Aug 2008|05:11pm]

This new segment is called "Posting old AIM conversations with Sean Freeman."

Today's segment features one of the very first AIM convos I've ever had with Sean Freeman (circa 8/14/04). Very nostalgic. Very transporting.

Take a look.Collapse )
1 entertained.

Ricky Lake = Joffy? [22 Apr 2007|04:23pm]

2 entertained.

oh shi The Exalted/Nonuglies [06 Feb 2007|07:13pm]


I remember this girl. Have I been on LJ for too long?
5 entertained.

Random Thought [19 Jan 2007|06:41pm]

Another of the world's oldest persons has died. I don't know if I personally would want the title because once you get it, it means you're going to die. After all, I don't have any stats at my fingertips, so I don't know who is the longest-serving, longest-living person, but the position doesn't appear to have any longevity.
0 entertained.

Let me see your warface! [14 Jan 2007|06:13pm]

Sup, Mengus.
4 entertained.

Ursula Martinez [28 Dec 2006|01:18am]

I just noticed that there hasn't been a post to this community in almost a month and a half. So, because I'm bored and there's few things more entertaining than a dancing naked magician, I thought I'd toss out this link to some content which I didn't create, but which might help get this party restarted.
1 entertained.

[12 Nov 2006|03:55pm]

Review me, plz.
10 entertained.

Too Busy With Baby Poop For A Real Entry [16 Oct 2006|03:01am]

equivocator started it. joffy continued the trend. I simply co-opted the idea for my own to feel like a civic leader.

The community add_me is begging for snark and I'd like us to oblige. Quite simply, I challenge any and all to put up an entry. Whoever gets the most friend additions as a direct result of that action is the winner. The winner will recieve a fanny pack and a lifetime supply of lip-gloss, not to mention our highest esteem.

mengus has opted to rise to the challenge. You know vengeance_is_me is down to get his silly on. Are you game?
51 entertained.

Ganked Fun from YouTube [11 Oct 2006|01:56am]


"You in your boxers too?"

1 entertained.

[09 Oct 2006|04:17pm]


Say hello to Michael Freeby. He wants to be friendssss.
32 entertained.

geniuses at work [19 Aug 2006|05:29pm]

'today i filled my neighbor's mailbox with my dog's poop and then later at a block party she asked me if i knew who did it. I was like "bitch, stop stealing my daffodils from my yard. my son will bite you. next time i'll have him fill it with his own poop."'

-paige's "feed"
0 entertained.

Geniuses at Work [19 May 2006|08:40pm]

I was told my last post to this community may not have been trashy enough, but it was something I wanted to express and it is slightly amusing, so I put it here. Now, I could mine some of the appropriately tagged stuff from my own blog*, but to a few they'd be repeats and to me, they're old hat.

Instead, I'll try to fill the blank of a slow weekend with something unoriginal and post a partial transcript from this video, featuring my girlfriend Morgan Fairchild Jessica Alba as she's working the red carpet at the GLAAD awards;
I think anything that is positive and puts a positive spin on, ah, people and celebrating, you know, gay and lesbian. Anything that has to do with that is amazing.

Though, the long rant from Brandon Davis with Paris Hilton should be the true winner from this genre, but it has been over-blogged and isn't very worksafe.

*Side effects may include gas with oily discharge, an increased number of bowel movements, an urgent need to have them and an inability to control them. Please see our ad in the October issue of the Saskatoon Shopper for more information.
0 entertained.

Fun with Photos [18 May 2006|11:42am]

With the right framing, General Hayden looks like he belonged on the wrong side of WWII (Göring?);

And in a different light, he favors Elmer Fudd;

But, when you cut right down to it, he reminds me of a guy who lives with his mother and buys soiled underwear;
6 entertained.

Paige Maguire - Internet Hellian [08 May 2006|08:34am]

There are two constants on Livejournal - biscuiteater hates whatever you deem interesting and Everybody Loves Paige. 9 out of 10 emofucks agree - Paige's entries are worth putting down the razor for (albeit temporarily). She brings her undeniable style and rapier wit with her everywhere she appears and the world always seems a bit colder after she departs. Paige's celebrity is even beginning to rival that of Chuck Norris in internet lore. I'm as much to blame for it as anyone, being a longtime barnacle on the hull of her majestic internet yacht, singing her praises to all that would listen, but I can no longer live a lie. It's time everyone knew who Paige really is.

Paige is a pro-bono kitten abortionist, Nazi sympathizer, and Mets fan. She kills indiscriminately with a vigor that would have made Uday Hussein blush. Her entire image is just a cultivation of other personalities she has studied while weaving an elaborate personal tapestry of fabrications and half-truths. There is no Paige, there is only Zuul. This isn't some half-baked agenda of rage on my part - I'm willing to let the facts speak for themselves:

* Paige once fired Jesus from a contracting job on Christmas - his birthday.
* Paige had an on-going bet with Wilt Chamberlin on who could bed the most women. Paige won by a margin of the entire country of Brazil.
* Paige has slept with multiple members of OPEC in attempts to convince them to drive the price of gas up even further.
* Paige sided with Metallica when they were shutting down Napster.
* Paige decided to birth a child just so she would have someone shorter than her to dangle toys above, just slightly out of their reach.
* Paige spearheaded the war in Iraq just to get her husband out of the house
* Paige routinely goes to hardware stores to pick-up day-laborers. She then immediately drives them to the nearest border patrol station and notifies the officers to release the attack dogs.
* Paige embeds malicious spyware into each of her customized web-designs that blocks access to any blog that receives more traffic than paigemaguire.com
* Paige makes her son and dog battle daily for her table scraps - their sole source of nutrition. Her diet consists entirely of tortured souls.
* 73% of all internet traffic is porn-related, the other 27% is directly correlated to comments on Paige's livejournal. 42% of that porn-traffic is dedicated to people masturbating to Paige's comment replies.
* Paige is actually Keyser Soze

If you're still not convinced, there's been documentation throughout history of Paige facilitating or participating in the dirtiest of dastardly deeds. Don't believe us? Look for yourself:

Opposed to popular belief, Paige did not shoot President Lincoln while donning a John Wilks Booth mask, but she did see the assassination coming and didn't even warn the president. She was overheard saying, "Watch this part, Mr President, it's my favorite. Just don't look behind you, or else you might miss it." He didn't miss it, that's for sure.

That's right, she's the one that pushed the iceberg into the path of the Titanic. She's also the one that drowned Leonardo DiCaprio. SHE'S king of the world, bitch.

Most people have instances where they're faced with a dilemma and an angel and a devil will appear on their shoulders, verbally duking it out over how to handle the situation at hand. But one when one is as evil at Hitler, it's a tad different. There's no angel and devil, it's the devil and his most feared opposition: Paige.

To save face, Paige convinced lapdog Lyndie England to have her face digitally layered over the one you see here. England faced ridicule, a dishonorable discharge from the service, and has become the butt of every cigarette-dangling picture on the internet. What you might not not know is, all the men in the pictures were the 72 virgins promised to Paige by Alla.

This notification and warning has been brought to you by shamroq and vengeance_is_me. If we somehow happen to "disappear", you know what happened. Goodnight, and good luck.
29 entertained.

Cintra Wilson on Tom Cruise Control [28 Apr 2006|09:27pm]

Couldn't resist exerpting again from cintrawilson. No more after this. I'll figure if you liked it you friended her feed.

article #9 just came through. Highlight:

Tom Cruise is has begun vocally denouncing his abusive, alcoholic father…apparently to turn the tide of tabloid opinion and make the public feel sorry for him, since there has been little support for “Cruise Control” since mate Katie Holmes has begun to resemble the psychological equivalent of a bonsai tree.

This sort of gossip column I can deal with.
14 entertained.

exerpt from Cintra Wilson Feed [28 Apr 2006|01:43pm]



Being famous means that you don’t need to use public restrooms anymore….because the world is your public restroom. I bet you didn’t know that incontinence was fashion-forward. That’s probably because you’re not rich enough.

Paris Hilton has apparently been leaving her territorial mark anywhere she feels like it – just because she feels like it, and she can do anything she wants to — so there. The New York Post reported in October, that Paris had “an accident” in the corridor of a Las Vegas hotel. Mike Walker of the Enquirer wrote that a couple of weeks ago, Maui cab driver Harden Jamison picked Miss Pis up late one night with Greek man-o-kopeta Stavros Niarchos. While he drove, Jamison claims, the heiress hiked up her blue satin dress and relieved herself in his back seat . . .

That is from vol #3. 3-8 are now up at cintrawilson
0 entertained.

Love is in the Air [20 Apr 2006|12:10pm]

Learning to Savor a Full Love Life:

"Their next hurdle will be moving from their family homes, both in Brooklyn, to a group residence. There, for the first time, Ms. Graham, who is mentally retarded, and Mr. Ruvolo, who has Down syndrome, will be permitted to spend time together in private.

The pair were coached in dating, romance and physical intimacy by a social service agency at the cutting edge of a new movement to promote healthy sexuality for the seven million Americans with mental retardation and related disabilities.


Ms. Fyne urged them to pose one sex question they had always wanted to ask. Questions included "How can you get a girl to wear sexy lingerie?" and "How do you stop somebody from being in such a hurry?"


Dr. Levy described an incident involving a client at a group home before the institute's current policies evolved. The 25-year-old resident was arrested in a public bathroom having group sex with several men he did not know. When Dr. Levy went to bail him out of jail, the young man was in tears. "Where am I supposed to go to get my needs met?" he asked.


Indeed, Ms. Fyne and others have learned that social isolation is a more pressing issue than sexuality. At an early class, Ms. Fyne asked students whether it was "O.K. to have one partner in the afternoon and another in the evening?"

The response was a wake-up call. "I don't know how to get a date, Bobra," one student called out. "So the rest of this is just garbage.""
33 entertained.

Limericks - THA REMIXES [04 Apr 2006|10:19am]

Since pdanielson is just now finally making the rounds, I thought it a good time to change things up a bit. I call upon everyone that has written a limerick previously, or in joffy's case "freestyle limerick-esque nonsense-infused slam poetry", to create one regarding themselves. I can see there's a lot of possible realms for abuse that were not covered and I'd hate to see them overlooked. I have happily initiated the self-loathing below and expect you to follow suit. C'mon, Entertainers, let's beat this already beaten dead horse some more!

I'm a self-proclaimed sensation
Whose website lacks adulation
No one really cares
For my unfunny wares
My writing requires cessation
13 entertained.

[31 Mar 2006|08:37pm]

Wanna know something funny? I just found out that at some point in time between a month or two ago and now, I have been banned from Brandon's journal.

10 entertained.

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